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I am alone a lot.

I talk to myself pretending I am having conversations with people I know.

Planning it out so one day I can have it with them.

Never works like it does in my head.

So alone.

It’s fun, but still very different from what people see me as. 

I am not quiet or to myself. 

But that doesn’t mean I can’t be. 

I walk around talking and saying how I feel.

Stay awake in bed just talking and sometimes even cry.

Lots of emotions surface during this time.

Who could I be talking to?

God?

Myself?

Anyone who will listen? or even just hear it?

What do I have to say?

Maybe I am thinking too much. 

I need someone to talk to.

Because not knowing is driving me crazy.

Almost there.

Where was I headed? 
         Somewhere….over the rainbow… 

I don’t know. 
           Can’t you see I am scared? 

I keep answering what people ask. 
         Where do you want to go? 

Yes.
     They were okay… 

No.
     I want to be somewhere where I will be liked…. but no one will like me….not even there… 

Maybe?
         Can I just go cry now? 

Let me think….. What did you say again?

Gah! Can’t think! 

I want to cry. 
       WHY? Because you asked me a deeply personal question. 

Can’t I go to bed? 
        And get away from you…. 

I need sleep.
         stay up later thinking…thinking… 

Lets talk later.
       and now… 

I don’t want to grow up.
         Yet I do… 

This is all scaring me.
           I am so nervous…. I keep twitching…… 

Leave me alone.
        Stay with me…. 

Why can’t I just die?
         I don’t want to die…. o.o

AHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!
             Just LET me run away… Far away…

I wish I had a twin sister. 

Someone who would be like me but not me. 

I try to find a friend who could fill that role.

But it never fits right. 

Or something happens making the friendship fall. 

I want to talk to someone about everything going on. 

With my personality, I let people talk to me and tell me whats wrong.

But I don’t tend to tell them what wrong with me.

I find myself crying to people and just not knowing what to tell them.

I think I just want them to know something is wrong.

I think something happened and I stopped working right.

I can’t seem to tell people anything so maybe If I had another me….

Maybe then I wouldn’t feel so lonely.

I wish I had a twin.

Someone like me…

So I can get thoughts outside of my head.